When I was 12 years old, I was overweight, I wore black (band) shirts, and ripped jeans with studded belts. I wasn’t one of the “cool kids”, and the only people I was “popular” with were the bullies (they really enjoyed kicking the crap out of me for some reason). Nobody ever took me seriously, and I didn’t have many people in my life that I could call friends. My home life wasn’t really any better. Between my overzealous Mormon stepfather, and my ex-drug addict mother who acted like she despised the very ground I walked on, I never felt comfortable, even in my own home. The conditions I lived in turned me into an extremely rebellious child. When I wasn’t home plucking away on my beat-up acoustic guitar and smoking pot out of a soda can, I was usually hanging out at the local mall foraging cigarette butts out of the ashtrays and stealing band t-shirts and CDs from various stores. 

                  Music had always been a massive release for me. I would spend hours walking the streets, or riding city buses around the Los Angeles area with my headphones on, watching the world pass me by to my very own personal soundtrack. When I was skipping class, I was usually at some park, smoking a pack of cigarettes, and sipping on a 40oz of King Cobra that I got some uncaring adult to purchase for me, while clutching my Sony Walkman and blasting my latest pilfered prize from the Barnes and Nobel down the street. One afternoon as I scanned the titles of the latest releases, I came across an album bearing a black, weathered-looking cover with red lettering that read “AFI: Sing the Sorrow”. I’m not sure what drew me in, but I walked to the listening station, hit “Disc 3” and the album started…that was when my life took a drastic turn. At that moment I heard a band that would change my life forever. I couldn’t even begin to describe the way that I felt standing there listening to this beautiful music, but these days I can tell you with utter confidence that what I was feeling was catharsis. The soothing of wounds that were opened long ago. 

                  I can’t say that AFI healed me or fixed all my problems, but this band made life bearable (which kept me alive). I listened to AFI daily for years. I sought out every album and single I could and bought every single one of them. This music began to make me a better person, not because it had some righteous or virtuous message laid out in their lyrics but because I wasn’t experiencing the pain of my existence as deeply as I had before. I wasn’t pent up with angst and aggression because I had a healthy release and something on which to focus my negative energies. Unfortunately, over the last 20 years, I never had the money or the opportunity to see a live performance from this band that had helped me in so many ways. Until this year…finally! AFI was coming to a town near me, and I was going to make sure that I was there. 

                  On October 28^th I made my way to Phoenix, Az (a 3.5-hour drive from where I live) and when I arrived in the parking lot of The Marquee Theater the line was already winding its way down the street. I waited outside for a while before I was let in and instantly made my way to the merch line. AFI has a great collection of shirts and hoodies on this tour so naturally, I ended up spending a lot more than I ever had at a concert. After I was loaded up with my mementos, I made my way down to the barricade to photograph the first band. What surprised me right off the bat was that the doors opened at 6:30 pm but the first band wasn’t due to go on until 8 pm. I came to understand the reason for this once the band hit the stage. Normally openers only play to about a quarter of a room because not many people have heard of them. Drab Majesty, however, went on to play to a full house.

I had never heard of Drab Majesty until I saw the lineup for this tour. When I looked them up on Apple Music, I really enjoyed their feel. Their downtempo darkwave style had me feeling like I should be sitting somewhere in a dark nightclub in Santa Carla sipping something that might be mistaken for blood. Drab Majesty made their way on stage dressed in grey 3-pieces with white undershirts. Guitarist and vocalist Deb Demure came on stage brandishing a bottle of white wine which they took a nice pull from and silently toasted the crowd. Both of their faces were painted in silver metallic face paint and adorned with large 80’s style wrap-around sunglasses. I enjoy when bands take on alternative personas, I believe it allows the audience to connect with the performance in a way that wouldn’t be possible otherwise. By doing this I feel like they can draw the audience in much deeper than a typical artist might normally be capable of. These artists transcend the plane of the average concert consisting of musicians playing music on stage for a crowd, and move into the realm of performance art. 

Drab Majesty’s set was hauntingly beautiful. Their dark yet enveloping synth melodies layered over their 80’s-like soundscapes with heavily reverbed vocals really took you to a different place. The stage was kept dark, and the lighting was of simple reds and blues. This experience felt like a dream. I loved the way this band made me feel while performing live, and I would love to see them perform again in the future. Once Drab Majesty had finished off their set and the last note rang off into the night releasing their hypnotic hold on the audience, Deb took one more pull off the bottle of white wine and walked off stage. 

You could tell by the energy in the room that a lot of these people were diehard AFI fans just as I am. The chanting began well before the band was ready to make their way onto the stage, but after about 20 minutes, drummer Adam Carson made his way to the drum kit. Then came guitarist Jade Puget, followed by Hunter Burgan, and finally vocalist Davey Havok. When Davey walked out it was like a shotgun blast! He ran across the stage, jumped onto the center riser, and threw his hands up into the air as the band jumped into one of their most popular songs, “Girls Not Grey”. The crowd was utterly lost in the music from the moment that they played their first note. I don’t think I have ever seen a band that could match the energy that AFI put forth on that stage. Davey Havok has such a beautiful stage presence. His performance is not only exciting, but dramatic, evocative, and electrifying. This is a band that is able to transcend the limits of time and space. You are taken from the venue floor and transported to an ethereal dark paradise of Havok’s own creation where dichotomy and dualism carry you among the cascading emotions that his lyrics evoke. With each person experiencing their own personal journey due to Davey’s ever-ambiguous lyrics, it is no wonder how this band came to be a favorite amongst so many different demographics.

The audience in the venue this evening was beyond emotional. As I scanned the crowd, I looked from face to face and found that there were quite a few of them with hot tears streaking down their cheeks. I was glad to find that I was not the only one. This band had helped me through so much over the years and I know that this was also the case for many that were in attendance that evening. What could you really expect of a band that cannot be defined, a band that has put forth 11 full-length studio albums and countless singles. AFI has floated between numerous genres grabbing people from each one and bringing them together as nobody else could. I am honored to have been able to photograph them, I am grateful to have found their music at such a young age, and I hope that everyone can find themselves a band that makes them feel like no matter how dark life gets everything will be okay. Most of the dates on the remainder of this tour are already sold out. However, if you can get a spot at one of these stops, I highly recommend doing so. There isn’t a concert going on today that can match the energy that AFI puts off. That in and of itself is worth the price of admission.